"You have a farm in Michigan - I noticed. - As you have heated the house? What do you cook? "Stove on our farm topitsya wood. In winter it is used for heating. It was also the cook. " A fuel which takes "- I asked. "I have a large plot of forest," - replied the farmer. "But that cut on fuel?" - I asked. "When the oak, when ash. This is not only elm ruble, its so hard to stick to the wood. "
"So, from the current day will be cut down only vyazy - I ordered. - When the cut elm and raspilite him to pieces, you'll have time after time vgonyat ax in the log to split it in half along its entire length. This is scary noncompliant wood. Split one vyazovy chump like a dozen split oak. So, when you feel that even a moment - and you sorvetes, grabs an ax and cut this fucking chump and let out a couple accumulated. I do know what a prick elm - terrible job not to think. So he and discharged at its vyazovyh churbakah.
Siegfried: I have a question. You gave examples of where people are always carried out your suggestion and with great inspiration, which can not be said about my patients. (Laughter) I think that in many cases they do not want to do what they are told.
Erickson: This is my home and asked: "Why is your patient to perform all these idiotic assignments that you give them?" I answer them: "I say to them very seriously. And they understand that I truly believe in what I say. I am extremely sincere. I do not have a drop of doubt, that they comply with my instructions. I even thought that not read: "Are they going to do this nonsense?" No, I know they all do. "
Once a woman came to me and asked to take her husband and help him to quit smoking using hypnosis. Her husband, a lawyer by profession, earning 35,000 dollars a year. Before marriage the wife will inherit a quarter of a million dollars. For the money, they bought a house. It pays taxes and utilities. For my money buy food. I paid my income tax and taxes and her husband had not been on what he spends his 35,000 a year.
All this I learned from conversations with her husband. I understood that it is for that not to quit. I told him so, and said at the end of our time talks and asked permission to invite the Cabinet of his wife and tell her that he was born a loser. Maybe she will stop when it saw about smoking.
Counsel agreed that I had called his wife and in his presence, he said that he was born a loser and not worth it cut away. I felt entitled to do so. Indeed, the lawyer must know the value of ordinary English words. He should be able to use them.
Inviting his wife to the office, I said to her: "I am very sorry to say this to you, but your husband - a born loser. It seems to me that does not make sense to cut and pester him. He does not want to quit smoking and do not abandon. "
Two days later, fly it to my office without an appointment. And on cheeks tears flow directly in streams. "I fill with tears as soon as I need to go to the doctor. From my tears puddle on the floor already formed, as it is now. And tomorrow, I lead children to the pediatrician. I am all obrevus on the way there and back. Can I like someone to help? "" Yes, the tears - it is a children's class. And often do you cry? "- I asked. "Once taken for any cause. I graduated from college with a diploma teacher. So when I got in school, I Revel for a week. Soon the school had to leave too much, I cried. "
"Of course. Tomorrow you'll have to keep the children to pediatrician. And you will cry all the way there and back. I believe that roar - it is engaging for children, then, we'll replace it with another children's activity, but less noticeable. Get salty cucumber behold this size (Eriksson shows), and stroke it all the way to the doctor and vice versa. "
A day later, the wife of a lawyer is to me terribly angry, but without tears. "Why do not you told me to stroke cucumber, which will be in the office?" (Erickson smiles.) "It's your fault, not mine. Here is a new job. Today at noon, you vzberetes at Squaw Peak, and tomorrow will come to me and report. "
The woman was the next day and said: "I Polezla at Squaw Peak, and, believe it or not, get lost at the very top. Lazila I lazila among some boulders and sharp rocks, not yet chosen to the top. And, you know, I covered the feeling of joy of personal achievement, fulfillment of something important. Tomorrow I again useful to rush and do not sobyus from the path, and then come to you and report back. I still think going down, as I wangle stray from the path. It is simply impossible to lose. "
The next day she spoke about her successful rise to the peak and the joy of achievement, which again covered it.
It took a while and then the wife of a lawyer suddenly came to me. "I think my husband is married to his mother rather than to me. He can not do anything at home - no crane to repair or fix what trifle. But is his mother call him in the hour of the night, he immediately got dressed and mchitsya through the city to fix her faucet or hang a picture. But to do the same at home, he can not. I had to call plumber or joiner, or take up the case itself. "
"Of course, your husband should be your husband, not the husband of his mother," - I agreed.
"I do not love my mother-in-law - said the wife of a lawyer. - It may be without notice to state, after lunch, four hours, so even bring guests, but I must immediately prepare a delicious meal. I have some urgency to flee the shop for essential goods. I cook a wonderful dinner for her and her guests. But when I sit down with them at the table, I тошно and do not want to open your mouth. "
"I accept that from your mother-in-law is not very graciously declared it to you in four hours of the day and require lunch. When it appears the next time you prepare dinner, but do not sit down at the table. Refer to the fact that you have an urgent meeting of the evening. No matter where you go, even to walk, albeit in a movie. And do not go home before 11 pm.
Client came in a few days. "My mother-in-law with her husband and another guest said in four hours and asked to prepare a sumptuous meal. I followed your advice, prepared dinner - real jam. When it's time to sit at the table, I said that I had on the evening appointed an important meeting, and left. Back in the 11 hours, I saw my mother-in-law and her husband arranged their favorite pastime. They gave a guest to bestial condition, and all the carpet in the dining room was dirty vomiting. I had him clean. "
I said to her: "In this case, the guest, blyuyuschy on the carpet in the dining room, as well as those who condone it, do not have the right to request a special meal at any time and not get it." "I think so," - said the wife of a lawyer.
Once she came to me again. "I have to pay all bills and taxes, and their husbands. And he only occasionally has a package of products. And it is only because he want some favorite dishes. In San Diego a conference of lawyers, the husband wants me to go with him. And I do not want to. " But I said to her: "If he wants to take you with me, go. Once back, tell how you liked it. "
Upon his return, a woman came to me. "I wanted to stay in a hotel with a pool, but her husband insisted on another hotel on the opposite side of the street, where, supposedly, a better atmosphere. Basin was not there, and a special atmosphere, I did not notice. I had to pay a thousand dollars for one week. For meals paid separately.
When we went to the cafeteria, my baby polutoragodovalaya cams start knocking on his high chair with tray for food, and happily gurgle Launch bubbles. Annoyances her husband raised a knock and he slapped her across the face. An ugly scene. " I explained to her: "Your husband - lawyer and he should know the law on child abuse. It cost roughly with the child, and if you do not vosprepyatstvuete this behavior of her husband, you are on equal terms with him will be responsible in accordance with the law. " "I thought so, too, - the woman's consent. - I will not let him hit the child. "
It took several weeks, and the wife of a lawyer came back with me. "Raza, two, three, or four a year from my husband's debts appear: two, three, four or five thousand dollars. Then he asked me to sell some of my securities to cover its debts. " "You know - I said - people with an annual income of 35,000 dollars is to pay their debts, given that his wife shall bear all costs in the home and pays income taxes." "I also think so, - has agreed to his wife. - No longer throne securities. I added: "If you take them, then a quarter of a million enough for a while."
Even a few weeks she came with the new information. "Two or three times a year my husband demands a divorce. Yes, actually, about a divorce, you can talk. I do not know where it goes and where the remains. He is usually on Thursday evening and demanded that he was given a special dinner. And on Sundays, lunch, he had little to play with children and leave, but where, I do not know. " I replied: "I think you should talk to him frankly. Once he asked for a divorce, tell me frankly that disagree. So tell me: "Well, you get a divorce when you want, I say to you seriously. But uchti, there will be no more dinners on Thursdays and Saturdays, and I change all the locks in the house. "
She came to me in another six months and said: "I have grounds for divorce?" I replied: "I am a psychiatrist, not a lawyer. But I recommend to you an honest lawyer. " She recorded the address and quickly divorced.
It took approximately six months and on the eve of the Cabinet was again, my old friend, of course, without the prior record. "You helped me create a false impression," - she said. "How does it read?" - I am astonished. "When I was your last, and asked if I have grounds for divorce, you sent me to a lawyer who has a divorce legally. But when I thought that seven years was the wife of the dregs, my soul to the gates. I am divorced for personal reasons! "
I asked: "If I offered you a divorce for personal reasons, how would you react?" "I would become a protected and tolerated such a marriage would be more" - she said. "That's all business. What you were doing the last six months? "- I asked. "As soon as I got a divorce, I began to teach at the school. The work I like. And I stopped crying. "
Taught her to iron salted cucumber da said that the husband she had born a loser. And he, though a lawyer, but not consistent, that should not be allowed to call himself a born loser. And until it is gradually Earnings ... each come to me with each complaint.
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